founders-heads Well, I’m going to pull back the violet curtain just a bit and admit that I’m actually writing this post Aug. 7.  For those of you who know about publishing, you know that an article has to be submitted a few weeks in advance so everything can be proofed and perfected before you, our beloved sisters, read our postings.  I let you see behind the curtain because it will explain what I’m thinking.


By the time you read this, bid day at my alma mater, Auburn University (War Eagle!), has occurred, but as of Aug. 7, formal recruitment hasn’t even started  yet. You know from last month’s post that this year’s recruitment is special for me. Eighty-six girls from my son’s high school class are going through formal recruitment, which is a lot from one school.


I’ve posted before about my recruitment story; it’s a painful one. I hate formal recruitment for one thing – some girls get nothing. It’s hard enough if you don’t get your first choice, but to get nothing is heartbreaking. Been there, done that.  I have a special place in my heart for the girl at the end of recruitment who feels unloved.  

When you start this process, you are so full of hope. You look around at the different parties and wonder which girls you are going to get to call sisters. On pref day, you just know that one of the two or three parties you go to will accept you and you’ll have friends for a lifetime. Then when it’s all said and done, you are left with nothing on a page. Your recruitment counselor comes to you and lets you know you’ve been cut by everyone.  

Can I tell you how hurtful it is? Can I tell you that it just stinks? Sometimes, it’s just a numbers thing. Sometimes, it’s because of something catty and ugly. Whatever the reason, those girls have my heart this month. They are the ones that, while everyone is excited for and celebrating with on bid day, I will truly be thinking of.


heart triangleIt’s true that the events of your life shape your perspectives. They allow you to look at something and see parts of it that others may not see. For those of you who had a dream recruitment, know I am so happy for you. I would never begrudge your memories or happiness. But remember as you write your recs and have your rush crushes, there will be a number of girls left with nothing. Give a little heart for these girls. If you know one of them, offer some encouragement and words of love. As we all know…”the greatest of these is love.” 

In Sigma with all my heart,




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2 Responses to Give a Little Heart

  1. Carly Mento says:

    Well said! At the end of it all, the experience should end with sisterhood and love. That’s the reason we rush in the first place, isn’t it? My chapter only had 8 sororities to choose from. If you didn’t fit the mold for one of those 8, you would likely be left with nothing, or maybe trying informal recruitment when you could (hopefully) squeeze in to the one you really wanted. I was VP of Recruitment my Jr year, and it really is tough to have to make the final decisions. I’m with you, sister!

  2. Anne says:

    I waited for that informal recruitment because I knew where I wanted to be…and while happy with that choice wish I had had more time with my wonderful sisters! Looking forward to see where my two legacies will end up in a few years!

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